Simulate & Manipulate

Posted on August 31, 2014


I’m 28 years old. I was born in 1986 and I used my first computer in the early 90’s. A Macintosh that ran programs off of true floppy disks. I had my first home computer in the mid 90’s running Windows 95. If I wanted information I reffered to MS Encarta. It was around this time that floppy disks were coming in the mail trying to get you hooked on using America Online. It wasn’t till my neighbor had gotten AOL on his laptop that I first discovered the Internet.

It is an indisputable fact that all of you reading this has posted and/or tweeted something on the internet at some point within the last 12 hours. And more than likely most or even all of it was done from a device in your pocket. In today’s age there is an infinite amount of content being shared and consumed over the net and it’s only gaining more momentum if you can imagine that. Texts, Posts, Likes, Hashtags, Memes, Emoticons, Snapchats, Tweets, Selfies, Photos, Videos and for most people, their entire life fucking story. There’s endless amounts of content from News, Reviews and Interviews to Information and Education to Movies, TV Shows and endless and endless amounts of all the porn you could ever want. Everything from Hardcore to Softcore to midgets blowing sheep. Kids today are born connected this way; and those that know what it was like to not be connected on the internet are completely wired in and switched on. Sometimes I wonder if anyone in today’s age knows how to turn it off?

It has become so easy for anyone to hide behind a screen and become anybody they want. It’s so easy for anyone to sit and have a voice without ever having done any work. And it’s has become an absolutely pathetic that people are so hooked into staring at a screen that they share every intricate detail of their lives. No one gives a shit that you “like” Rite Aid and no one gives a fuck that you just cooked spaghetti for your kids dinner. And the ones that post every detail of their love life, just hurry up and stay single. Oh wait, you’ll bitch and complain about that too! And trolls? Don’t even get me started with these angry fucks. They have nothing better to do than to spend their time hating shit they know nothing about. Regurgitating information they heard from someone else and just happened to agree with it. A wise man once said, the empty barrel rattles loudly! Then, there’s the ones that use the internet for something that’s actually productive. So as I have just pointed out, the majority of social networking is broken into three groups. The ones that reveal it all, the ones that hide it all and the ones that are neither of those other two.

Now before I move on, I know that at least by now some of you are saying, “but Marvin, you post things to Facebook too!” To fully clarify, I use the internet for merely two things. Promoting and spreading news on bands I’m involved with and cracking jokes, being sarcastic and filling your heads with satire. I post NOTHING personal and nothing I say is ever geared towards any one individual. So if you thought you were gonna be clever and try to make me a hypocrite, go chew on some shut the fuck up first.

So anyway, first to those that reveal everything on the internet. You know; embarrassing pictures of their kids that should remain in a family photo album, that trip you took to CVS to get your wife’s vagisil or that you just checked into the gym after stuffing your face at the buffet. photo-1I will say this, that if you think your information on the internet is safe, than you are dead wrong! And second of all, (as an example to all you mothers out there) posting embarrassing pictures of your kids for the entire world to see is just wrong. Your kids are going to eventually grow up to find out the entire world has seen them pissing their pants at the mall. This isn’t the cover of the Nevermind album. Respect the fact that your kids may have a little more privacy than you one day. And as for those that place their entire love life, every emotion, petty actions and every tiny detail on social media, know this…you make yourself look anti-social, you make yourself look pathetic and you make yourself extremely vulnerable. This comes from a guy who had his identity stolen once before and all that was stolen were pictures and very basic info. Don’t put your entire life story on social media. You never know who will take from it.

Which brings me to the next group. Those that hide it all. These are the ones that get on the internet and know that they can do whatever they want, whenever they want without the fear of consequences. They hide behind a keyboard either as a keyhole image of themselves or as someone entirely different. photo 1-1 They have no lives and a lot of time on their hands. There’s also the “trolls”. Ever seen a youtube video with one guy saying a bunch of shit and pissing off everyone? They have no picture and their youtube channel has no videos. So you know they are qualified to comment on anything. :/ These types know absolutely nothing about what they are commenting on but more or less just regurgitating information they heard elsewhere. They hear someone saying something that they decide they agree with and then when they find something that goes against what they agree with, they repeat what little information they heard followed by a bunch of negative banter. Then after someone calls bullshit it just becomes more arrogant sounding fuck you’s and creative curse words followed by even more repetitive regurgitation of information. Do yourself a favor and don’t engage conversation with these easily bothered people. I did a few times on a few different subjects to a few different people as a social experiment in preparation for writing this blog. They’re all the same no matter what the context. Frankly I’d rather eat skittles out of a dolphins ass before talking to one of these dumbasses again. And a few of you may be thinking, “Marvin, you’re trolling now”. Its not that in the slightest if you have done the research, examined the evidence and actually know what the fuck you’re talking about. Go eat a dick.

And as for the third group, the ones that are neither of the other two. The ones that are who they are, respect the reputation of others, know what they’re talking about and don’t run to a mirror twice a day for new profile pictures…I don’t really have anything to say. I don’t congratulate people for not being a cunt. I congratulate those that were cunts and improved themselves to be less of a cunt. Maybe you’re one of them, so bravo to you.

Yea I said cunt. Get over it.